Coyote "Inspirations"

Coyote the Trickster, we've all heard the stories about how he tricks Iktomi out of his roasted prairie dogs or how he stole fire or his hundreds of other stories.  (Wait, why is there no awful spider art? Believe me, I've been looking.)


Anyway, here are some "Awful" ways to express your connectedness to the coyote.  Disclaimer:  The blog author is not responsible for any wackiness that may occur in your life for embracing coyotes.


Getting in touch your inner Coyote...Or preparing for Coachella?

deviant art

This woman says, "I can create headdresses such as this from just about any tanned fur you hand me. Bobcat, wolf, mountain lion, bear, African black-backed jackal....you name it, I'll do it (so long as it's legal, of course!)."

Wait, I found this trolling on Etsy... Yes, it is the same woman and still very creepy.

.

from etsy

Her listing claims this is "Perfect for Halloween, religous purposes, Burning Man, bonfire parties, Pow-Wows, costume parties, re-enactors, cosplayers, or anyone who wants to feel more in touch with their inner animal."   The misspellings are hers.

Um...What?  I must have missed the Roadkill Pow-wow.  Do they hold that off of the Will Rogers Turnpike?

But is it as bad as this?

From ebay, at $104 with 4 hours to go...

Oh but he looks so happy!  You know, with his severed head hanging on the wall.  Yup, happy.
Somebody wants this in their house, if it's any of you, please do me a favor and never invite me over.

Not Dooney & Burke...

from etsy, where else?

Ever think, "I could use a handbag that can elegantly sheath my 6-8 inch knife.  Those Burlington Coat Factory sales just get really rough sometimes, you never know when you might have to gut someone for taking the last pair of size 8 1/2 tiger print horse-hair pumps."  The dead coyote in this case would just be a warning to others.


Sometimes, I can't decide if something is scary, awful, awesome or all three.

deviant art user "I am Art slave"

When I see this, all I can think about is devouring Frank the Bunny.

Somebody read Generation T:

From Etsy.com

I was wondering what I'd wear if I found a Hot Tub Time Machine in Oklahoma City.

Not Felipe Rose:

 from Wood Co.

The website says, "This artifact is a wild and exceptional display piece! This impressive wall mount comes from Native American artists Super Moon and Black Wolf. It is part of a limited edition, number 20 of 500, and features a hand painted lost wax image of an American Indian Warrior."  
Now, I'm not going to claim know every Indigenous artisan out there, but Super Moon?  It doesn't say what tribe(s) the artisans belong to, either, which always strikes me as odd, especially when there's that whole Indian Arts and Crafts Act of 1990.
(please correct me if I'm wrong about this)
However, the site does go on to explain,"Native Americans have always felt a special connection to nature. The belief that all things have a spirit is an integral part of their religions. The Zuni believe that animals are more like the Zuni deities than is man. They also believe that animals have more power than man and that these powers, both practical and spiritual, reside in their totems."
Um, what do the Zuni have to do with this exactly? Hey, but he has horse hair, bison mane and coyote fur and for the low, low price of $361.95 plus shipping he can be yours!  I recommend hanging him in the guest room.




 

Schlock-lahoma!

Schlock [shlok]  yiddish

–adjective 1.Also, schlocky. cheap; trashy: a schlock store.

–noun 2.something of cheap or inferior quality; junk.

 So, I spent the weekend in Oklahoma.  I used to live there so, you'd think I'd be used to it.   However, I'm always shocked by Oklahoma's love/hate relationship with it's Indigenous population.  They advertise it as "Native America".  However, when it comes to respecting actual Native Americans, well, that's a different story.  In Oklahoma, nowhere is safe from "Awful".

As soon as we crossed into South Coffeyville we were greeted with these:

at The Woodshed in South Coffeyville, where they also carry Lee Bogle greeting cards!
(yes, that is my pudgy little hand with the tape keeping my ring on, I'm classy like that)

Seriously, do people really buy their "Objets d'art" at the Gas station?

Gardner's Used Books, why?

*Sniff* I LOVE that place, too.

 Even the Goodwill...

  Teepees, cactus, cowboys, canoes and buffalo, really, this shirt has it all!
(yes, I shop at thrift stores, even on vacation)

And Walmart.

Okay, I have a friend that owns a similar shirt in purple and insists on wearing it around me in public.  He likes wolves, alright?  He wears the tie-dye shirt I made for him, too.

Meanwhile in the fabric department...

$2.50 a yard! What a bargain!

I want this fabric!  What the hell would I do with it, though?  

(Please leave "awful" ideas in the comment section, I might make it a reality!)

Let's not forget the Home decor section at Drysdales:

I had a "real" photo of these painted ponies and feel like I should have really cool story about how I lost it.  However, I am terrified for clowns and have a certain healthy unease about horses, too.  For me, horses are like those ladies at the country club.  I can admire their grace and beauty, but I have no desire to mount one.

 Talk about your Random Appropriations!

 Okay, this isn't Oklahoma, this is Chanute, KS.  It just struck me as strange.

And now for some Official Oklahoma Souvenirs!

In case you need to forget about Miley Cyrus for a while...

Speaking of drinking...

from ebay

From the seller's listing: "Retro Risque' Oklahoma Jiggers Drink Glass Indian Sooner
Today i have this Fantastic Retro and Risque' Oklahoma Jigger Drink Glass for Sale. This is a Great Bar Novelty Glass that has on the Front a Red Indian wearing a Feather in His Head Band and saying Hic, Hic. Apparently he is Drunk and Probably a big Chief at that. On the back of the glass it tells you What Type of Indian you are by how much You Drink. 2 oz. makes you a Papooses, 4 oz. a Young Squaw., 6 oz a Young Buck. 8 Oz. a Warrior and 10 oz makes You a Big Chief Only. What a great retro addition to your fine Bar Collectibles. Please do not think i am bias or pushing you to drink by me selling this item. I just think its a Funny Piece of History"

 Oh, I get it now, it was offensive, but now it's retro, risque and funny.  Puke.

Got Smokes?

from ebay

A quote from my husband (and Awful proofreader), "It fits."

Blog goddess note: Don't think I  hate Oklahoma and all that.  They got Braums, Whataburger and Rib Crib.  Plus, stuff keeps getting built within walking distance of my Mother-in-law's so I don't get lost while trying to escape for a while!  Then, there's Pow-wow season. Oh, and wild onions...