Sunday, April 3, 2011

The Unicorn Returns (SFW)

Zelduh on tumlr

 Blog goddess note:  This post comes on the heels of Newspaper Rock's post on "Land theft in My Little Pony" Yet another chunk my childhood has bee marred by bad writing and racism.  And here I thought Shia LaBeouf was the biggest threat to my innocent memories. 

For $2.99 you can download this book. 

A Challenge to be a Unicorn, A Native American Indian Pony book 2

 by Dawn Davies

This was self-published on March 10, my other unicorn post was published February 25, coincidence?

A brief description from Smashwords, “All unicorns have to spend time on Earth being a much loved horse, they have to earn golden stars in order to become a unicorn. This is book 2, all about a Native American boy and his horse.”

So, it's like a video game? Like playing Dora the Explorer, collecting all the stars to access the next level? Or Scientology?


What hipsters do in thier spare time...(Warning this a minute of your life you won't get back)

I have no frigging idea. 

The description says, A Native American is doing her daily dance to honor life, when she sees a mythical creature... a flying unicorn!!! The Native American tries to make peace, but the unicorn brutally murders the Native American - later boasting of her ability to fly. This is a symbolic reenactment of the horrors that befell the people who were once native to our land. The unicorn is seemingly innocent, but the true innocence is embedded within the Native American. She is pure, trusting, and as a result, is dealt a cruel fate.”

I think a better description would be, “Hey, I'm drunk and I have this hipster headdress and big green piece of paper hanging in my apartment! So, we got out that unicorn head from last year's key party and put together some racist bullshit!”


Meanwhile, if you need a Medicine Bag...

It might protect your virginity, who knows?

Psychics don't know we're laughing at them.

Yes, it a feather with a rainbow and a Unicorn!  I want to put in my hair, grab that pink Unicorn drum from White Ego Woman and see if I can get anybody at HINU to sing with me! 

Oh, but it gets better, Diane Tolleson is a psychic!  For $60 an hour, she gives psychic reading by phone, email or in person!  She, of course, also paints feathers.  For $75 dollars she will paint your Labrador on a crow feather.  Where has this woman been all my life?

Geeze, send me $60.   I'll tell you, "Everything is coming up roses" and I'll paint your cat with blueberry wojapi.
Painting by Mike (who does some really cute pet portraits)



  1. Oh, a unicorn. You know, only virgins can attract unicorns. I wonder if these New Agers have ever had a date.

    Golden stars? LOL Gotta catch em all! And if you get 100 gold stars, you get an extra life!

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